By giving honest answers to the following questions, you will get a sense of the quality of your current love maps. For the most accurate reading of how your relationship is doing on this principle, both of you should complete the following.
Read each statement and circle T for "true" or F for "false"
I can name my partner's best friend. T F
I can tell you what stresses my partner is currently facing. T F
I know the names of some of the people who have been irritating my partner lately. T F
I can tell you some of my partner's life dreams. T F
I am very familiar with my partner's religous or spiritual beliefs and ideas. T F
I can tell you my partner's basic philosophy of life. T F
I can list the relatives my partner likes the least. T F
I know my partner's favorite music. T F
I can list my partner's three favorite movies. T F
My spouse is familiar with my current stressors. T F
I know the three most special times in my partner's life. T F
I can tell you the most stressful thing that happened to my partner as a child. T F
I can list my partner's major aspirations and hopes in life. T F
I know my partner's major current worries. T F
My spouse knows who my friends are. T F
I know what my partner would do if he or she suddenly won the lottery. T F
I can tell you in detail my first impressions of my partner. T F
Periodically, I ask my partner about his or her world right now. T F
I feel that my partner knows me pretty well. T F
My spouse is familiar with my hopes and aspirations. T F
Scoring: Give yourself one point for each "true" answer.
10 or above: This is an area of strength for your relationship. You have a fairly detailed map of your partner's everyday life, hopes, fears and dreams. You appear to have some sense of what makes him or her "tick."
Below 10: Your relationship could stand some improvement in this area. Perhaps you never had the time or tools to really get to know one another. Or perhaps your love maps have become outdated as your lives have changed over the years. In either case, by taking the time to learn more about your spouse now, you'll find your relationship becomes stronger.